Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Dum Vivimus Vivamus

Let us live while we live
- Latin proverb

Our dance class tonight was cancelled. The reason was plainly shocking: a student's death. With the news came a challenge: seeing both sides of the curtain, which one do I choose to be at? Will I choose to remain in the higher dimensions, or go into the illusion of death out of conformity? I'll tell you later...
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I got it. It is like a magic eye picture: You see what you focus your eye on. It is not even your point of view, or a perspective. It is what you choose to look at.

We choose to see death as a tragedy even if it has nothing to do with us personally, because we choose to get involved in a drama. Why? We want to gain control over a situation. We want to be sure that what we do not want is not going to happen to us. In doing so, we focus on that we do not want. Fair enough, we attract what is in our focus into our view and into our life. Why not to be a bit smarter and do something different from what everyone else is doing? Yes, I am saying that you can choose outside of the conformity box. Shall we?

It is simple - may be not easy in the beginning due to our habitual thinking – yet, simple: Let go. Letting go of any control automatically creates a focus on live and joy. It may feel uncomfortable at first, since we become vulnerable. And yet, it is vulnerability that makes us invincible. By choosing to be vulnerable, we refuse to be victims. We actually become fluid. That fluidity gives us an immense power of a water stream.

Let us live while we live... May it be your motto that welcomes you into each and every day of your Life that awaits your discovery of how truly beautiful and harmonious it is. It is all yours, and it is all that you own. Be responsible: Enjoy!

Monday, April 27, 2009

Just A Memory

Do you realize how much we live in our memories, no matter how old those are? And if we feel something while bringing a memory to our mind, or, otherwise, going back to that time and place, we charge it with the energy of real life. It is not. So, what we do then is stretching our [physical] being over time and space.

Can your physical body hold such tension for long time? Not really. Hence, sense of insecurity, lack of balance and trust, worries and fears - you name it. And not surprisingly: Your body is literally all over the place! After a short while, pains and illnesses start to show up. You begin to fight them spreading yourself even thinner.

Stop right now, wherever you are.

Do you want to be healthy and happy? This is one single memory you need right now, for your body remembers how to. Let it.

Right at this moment, start to listen to your thoughts and your words. What are they about? If there is anything in there not about this very moment, release it. We all know, in theory that is, that past is just a memory and future does not exist, so each of them is just an illusion. Why to care? Why to worry?

You've got your precious moments of here and now, and that is all you've got. Use it - or lose it.

Start living right now, and watch a beautiful smile appear on your face. That is the true You: Happy and healthy, and it never was otherwise. Watch all your worries and pains disappear "miraculously", and know that You did it. And if one day you find yourself bathing in those memories of lost treasures of yours, just say, "Oops! I forget: The treasure is right here, in my heart, and it is only real in a fairytale of this moment."

Everything else is just a memory, a memory to be released graciously and with a smile from the heart.

What a beautiful world we create with our hearts at this moment!

With much love from the Heart,

ME

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Why Do We Ever Go Back?

Q: Why would I ever go back to where I was a month ago after all I have done and lived through to set myself free of that experience?

A: A good question indeed.

Q: Are you being sarcastic with me?

A: Not at all! What you are doing is simply being open and honest with yourself. As such, you are not afraid to keep your heart open. And that is exactly what brings you to where you want to be: a place of healed feelings that you want to experience, and you are unafraid to live with. That is where the happiness lives. That is where you planned to find your way to before you started your journey with your eyes closed, you see.

A: I really want to understand what I feel...

Q: Yes, you know it: Feelings cannot really be understood, labeled, or categorized. They cannot be controlled. You are still trying, you know that; you are trying to control your feelings. That is something that cannot be done. Just let go; whatever it is, letting go is the only way to see if it is going to go away completely and live no longer for you, or ... Do not expect us to tell you what you are going to feel, for we do not know. That is the beauty of life: You can only learn what's next by living it. Just enjoy it - it worth it. And you are really getting it now. You are so much into the Truth of what life and love is, that we tell you: everything is in perfect and divine order in your life right at this moment. Seek no longer any "improvement", just enjoy. It will only get better for you this way.

You still worry too much, and you still jump back and forth in you linear time. Stay still, live in a moment, and enjoy yourself. We'll take care of everything else; no, not for you, but with You.

Be simple, easy, flowing. Yes, flowering, of course. Do not worry about any kind of relationship with friends and others. Everything in this moment is perfectly fine; anything else is just a memory...

P.S. For the second part of this conversation see the next post Just A Memory, and for some thoughts preceding these questions - Notes from Curaçao posted for April 14 & 15.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Underground: A Parable

Imagine if you have lived all your life underground, and a leader used to draw stars for you to tell you how it looks high up there, in the sky.

But one day, the thick curtain suddenly falls... You see a star, and you feel it is real - as real as you are. You know what it is to feel now, and, most importantly, you know you can choose for yourself!

What does it mean for your leader? You are right: loss of power and control – something people do not easily give up. And she does not.

You are asked whether the picture of the stars look more familiar to you than that object from the Unknown.

They certainly do, for you used to contemplate them for years.

You are asked if you have ever seen anything as bright as that star in the sky? And if not, how do you know it is not harmful? And even if you might think it is not, it is just an illusion of yours…

Happy choosing!

* * *

P.S. This parable came up while I was listening to a great jazz tenor-sax player Chris Potter last night at McCarter. Curious to learn more about the artist, I went to his website. I read that one of his albums is entitled Underground. Another coincidence :)

Friday, April 24, 2009

Grounding into the Body

There is a lot we can talk about in regard to grounding, but we do not intend to invent a wheel here. The biggest secret is that you know everything about your body already, i.e., if you choose to listen to your Body, and not what is being said everywhere around you.

“It is just business, Mom!” Said my 8-year old shrugging his shoulders.

He is right; it is obvious that everybody is doing his or her business, nothing personal. What is yours, then? Your first and foremost business is to take care of yourself.

A body is our biggest asset. It is through the physical body that we shine our light. It is with the physical body that we create, feel, experience, and share our gifts with others.

The opposite is true as well: denying the physical body, or not paying enough respect to it, results in lack of trust to your own feelings and suppressing of your natural light. Unfortunately, it is what was happening for ages with many people who chose spiritual growth only. This illusion is still a reality for many.

It is now time to understand, that our own bodies are our best guides: all we need to do is to listen to our feelings and to pay a little respect. You deserve it.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Out-of-the-Body Living

Two days ago, sitting in a dental chair for a regular cleaning, I realized why I’ve always had such high tolerance for pain: I never was fully in my body!

The road to this discovery was paved by my experience at Jim Self’s seminar last month. Being “volunteered” onto the stage to help with a demonstration of his first tool, the rose, I understood the moment of jumping out of the body, the exact feeling of it. I realized that we do it when we are scared, insecure, uncomfortable, and “just in case” in most cases. I’ve been watching how often I do it ever since. I learned so much from such a trivial, it seems, realization.

Back to the dental office, memories of the instances when I would faint before I communicate that I am in a severe pain are surfacing in my mind. Yet, I could not find memories of what I did during the three weeks I spent in bed and in pain last year after the car accident. Where was I? Some place, certainly not in my body experiencing that pain. So, I never complained. :)

Only a year later, I understood that it took me weeks after the accident to return to my body, i.e., start grounding. It is an ongoing process, and it is fun to watch the results, not to mention creating them!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Earth Day's Grounding

What can be more logical than exploring aspects of grounding on Earth Day? I did it today, and I have a lot I'd like to share.

Yet with as much acceptance as it took me to publish the previous post, I am done for the day. It has to be tomorrow. The Explorer just crushed at least half-a-dozen times in a row. Good night!
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Grounding is such a big topic that I do not know where to start. Wait, I know exactly how it works: by letting go of all the thoughts. With them, all the habits, attachments to rules and definitions, a "passion" for analysis and judgment, are gone. This way, we communicate from the Source.

Grounding has many aspects, and is extremely important for us at the moment. I could add a lot on that, but since we let go of all thoughts, there is just a flow of energy, embraced in words. It opens all different ways of communication - a good place to start.

We'll talk about grounding into a human body, grounding our homes and computers, and our feelings and emotions. When ready...


















Magnolia blossom blanket for earth on Princeton University grounds.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

A Pain in My Temple

For two full days I’ve been contemplating the transmission below. I did not want to publish it; I did not think it was that important. Finally, I admitted a case of self-sabotage. Knowing that place too well, I danced myself out into the light. And here we go.

Below, I am talking about a headache, and it is in reference for a side of a head that I use the word “temple”. However, I could not resist the pun, so the topic implies another meaning as well: a sacred place, a place of worship. There is more on the latter meaning coming soon, as well as on out-of-body experiences and grounding; now – to the headache.

April 21, 2009

9:07 a.m.
A headache… More than anything else, it scares me. Otherwise, I know I am fine. I know, it is a process of rewiring, integrating the grounding that I made happen yesterday.

Last night, while coping with debilitating headache, I was trying to figure out, “Why?”

“Maybe, too much grounding...” I thought.

I guess it was true, but partially true. The process of grounding was perfect – as everything that we allow to happen for our benefit and for the highest good. But perhaps I did not adjust my habits after that: I had too much caffeine and too much food for the new state. Being grounded, we need different quality and quantity of what we receive to our body, I am learning.

9:11 a.m.
A Message:

I am now fully grounded Goddess of All That Is. I need not to understand uniqueness or greatness of this fact, but just to accept uniqueness and greatness of a human being I am, Tatyana Petrovicheva. This is sufficient, and this is “required”, to speak human language.

And there will be steps that will help to accept this new collaboration. Once again, as personal as it is, this is for the benefit of All.

Watch your habits, and change them as you feel needed for you. Look nowhere else but inside.

Relax, and let the book flow. Relax => flow (NB!). Let go of everything.

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For today’s post – or to clear my thoughts off it:

Did I ever mention stoning? I am delighted to report that what was promised to never happen again is happening to Earth right now, and it is happening to me right now.

As soon as I tuned in to that wave yesterday, being fully grounded, I felt the excruciating pain in my head. It scared me, for somehow I knew that pain causes death.

There was one particular spot, a left temple, that was in pain since yesterday. What I see now is that at some point in a linear timeline they stoned me to death once again – what’s new?

A movie is unfolding…

Among those people there was One who loved me with all his heart. He chose to join them, for he could not save me then. What he did, he aimed the stone at my temple, my left temple, and it was an instant relief. I could now watch the crowd from a few feet above with no feelings (not entirely true) and with no judgment. Regarding feelings, there was Love. No, not that human conditional love, but eternal True Love.

All that is written in Mineral Kingdom, and well kept, for not a single step maid by humanity, not a single tear shed was in vain. Every step and every tear were bringing us closer to to-day, the Day when we can feel and love, and not to be stoned for that.
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Let go of the pain, release the fear, feel the Love.

You are supported by the Universe and the Infinite Herself.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Quote from a Mandala Calendar: April

"In the depth of your heart is a love so pure it requires nothing, asks for nothing and takes nothing. It simply loves."

Saturday, April 18, 2009

A Blue Index Card

I used index cards for presentations back at the office and graduate school. Sometimes, I would add a drawing – a smiley face or a little flower – as a reminder to relax and to smile, for I used to be very serious, way too serious for life!

I know that now, a year after I faced a wall between me and my office with the projects and the dissertation locked in there. Piece-by-piece, I begin to see how that wall was created.

Yesterday, in search for something rather unimportant, I was sorting through mountains of paper files. I do not know if I will ever have enough time in this life to organize them properly, for I am a perfectionist (or, I used to be, and it no longer serves the balanced ME, so there is a chance!). And out of the blue, a blue index card flew out of a pile.

On that card, on 01/08/08, I wrote:

“Make every person feel special.”

“Start with self”, an addition dated 01/14/08 states.

And more written on January 8, 2008:

“My mission, my goal, my dream: to make every person I can reach feel special; thus, I want to reach many people in the World.”

And more, highlighted:

“Every day in every way I make yet another person feel special.”

I was silent for a while. It is amazing how we create. And while I am grateful to my experiences, I am happy to share the fact that you do not need to live through a car accident or an illness to start doing what you really came to this life for. Just have fun with your life, and enjoy every moment of being! You can do it. :)

P.S. You can find some “technical support” in Mastering Alchemy (March 31, 2009).

Friday, April 17, 2009

New Chapters

I finally got to put some of my writings into the cyber space. I am catching up with what I think is of importance, so I went back to March 27. I'll keep adding more daily. Just scroll down, and enjoy the reading, if you choose so.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Hopscotch

***
April 2, 2009
PHL - MIA

***This piece is no longer available here. It now appears as a part of a collection Orange Wings: Poetry of The Shift in digital and printed formats.

Look for Orange Wings on Amazon.com:

Orange Wings [Kindle Edition]
Publisher: com.Unity; 1 edition (April 1, 2012)
ASIN: B007QOVWPK

Orange Wings [Paperback]
Publisher: CreateSpace; 1 edition (April 30, 2012)
ISBN-13: 978-1475286663
ISBN-10: 147528666X

Follow Orange Wings on Facebook:
www.facebook.com/orange.wings.poetry

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

More Notes from Curaçao

April 10, 2009

The moon is looking at me through the racing across the starry sky clouds. Here, by the sea, the air is almost still. Just an occasional breeze plays with the palm trees. The rapidly flying clouds seem to move in a different reality. Full just yesterday, the moon also is out of this world today for me, so full of hope just a day ago.

This is our last night in Curaçao. And, who knows, might be my last one on the island at least for a while. And while it might be too early to put all the dots above the “i”s, I feel that my book is now finished: I can put it in writing.

I’ll let my ME to make final remarks while allowing my head relax a bit.

A Letter to me on the occasion of turning the last page of my first book.

Congratulations!!! Are we excited? Beyond words! Your book – that you indeed wrote before you started to live it, and this is how you knew where and when to move within choices that are always there - is completed. It does not mean, however, that your story is finished – but that is another story. :)

It is best for you to go to sleep now, for there was too much today to take – and to release. Well done indeed!

It is not just a praise. Our goal is to make sure you know you are on a right track. We cannot tell you what to do or where to go at any moment. We can – and do – however applaud you every time you make a step. Remember, there are no wrong moves: anything you do has a great value for you and for All That Is.

As of your question just now: you know, and you know that you know. You do not have to write that letter – just stay in the feeling of gratitude. Regarding publishing, once again: you know. Just stay open, and write. You will publish only what is good for all. And we’ll make sure. :)

Now, it is really late. Tomorrow you’ll have all day. Happy traveling! Enjoy. We love you beyond words. We Love You. Please stay. You’ve done so much: it worth it. Just watch. :)

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Thoughts from Curaçao

April 08, 2009

Q: What am I trying to understand today? What was that notion of a Big Day in my small notebook about?

A: Here we go again: questions. And yet, there is no learning from experiences without questioning every step on the way. By “questioning” we do not mean doubt, but feeling your way. That at times is being expressed in words. Let’s do it.

Today was a big day indeed. Why? Because you really started anew. After what was done yesterday with the hologram of the planet* and that what you did this morning with the feminine**, you can fully ground Mother Goddess to Earth. And you are actually in the process of doing it***. Ground it now, and we’ll continue in the morning.

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Comments:
added April 27, 2009

* Our planet has evolved into a star. And though it is a process, not a result, it is an incredibly powerful moment in the cosmos. How many would understand that? Perhaps, some one. How many will feel the change, is a whole different question.

** The history of abuse of our feminine side – for both genders – was healed. As soon as we willingly release it, it will be gone from humanity’s memories. Just imagine living in that balance!

*** The process was completed (although it is not a right word, for a process never stops in the higher dimensions, it evolves) on Friday, April 24th, a day of new moon, during a Kaanish Belvaspata session (Almine’s website for this healing modality: http://www.belvaspata.org/faq/31-general-belvaspata/52-kaanish-belvaspata.html). It was the first experience of cosmic travel in a physical body. (Oops, someone might say they know what it is! Well, I may be an old-fashioned person, but I happen to never in my life try any drugs, for my curiosity took a whole different path of clearing my mind, not the other way around.)

P.S. I am excited that there are people reading this who have not a slightest idea of what it is that I am talking about (except for the drugs part, of course), since soon it will be common knowledge, and we'll forget we ever thought it is not real!

Monday, April 13, 2009

Spring Break in Curaçao, April 2 - April 11, 2009

Day 1: We made it! In the darkness of a tropical night, we drove across the island from the airport to the lagoon called Lagun. Happy and joyous, we went swimming under the stars at ten o'clock at night.

Day 2: Could not stop taking pictures of the sun rising above the hills east of Lagun. What a gorgeous show! We made it to town today to buy groceries at the Dutch market. Why to drive all the way there? For a good reason: they sell Kinder Surprises!!! We bought three. :)

Day 3: What a view we have from our balcony! A day of relaxation; we spent it snorkeling in miraculously turquoise waters of the lagoon that we contemplated from our balcony in the morning.

Day 4: Climbing Mount Christoffel at sunrise (Michael at the Top: a picture below). We still had a whole day to swim and enjoy after that!

Day 5: Diving and swimming with sea turtles at Lagun in the morning, exploring Hato Caves in the afternoon, after that, going to an only movie theater on the island, taking a walk around historical part of the town, running across the opening Old Swinging Lady bridge, dining at an ocean front place in Otrabanda, walking back to Punda, and still making it back to the other side of the island for a well deserved night rest. Wow.

Day 6: Swimming with the dolphins.

Day 7: Snorkeling at Playa Lagun; an adventure to the Blue Room, an incredible cave filled with blue light that you have to dive into, that did not go as planned, for it was guarded by stinging jellyfish; swimming at Playa Santa Cruz instead, and dining at Jaanchee's.

Day 8: We crossed the island for the Ostrich Farm, and visited Aloe Plantation. At night, we went to a party at neighboring Bahia Inn, where a group of drummers played for us under the full moon. No words; it was all about feeling a range of frequencies.

Day 9: We stayed at Lagun, talked to people we met during the week, went to a couple of local beaches - just to see how crowded they are, and happily returned to our paradise.

Day 10: We are on our way home, but before that: I went to my morning date with the Ocean despite the rain, and Michael went to the pool shortly after the sun was out. He finally met kids who could speak English. He was so excited, that we had to decide whether we still want to catch our plane!

April 12, 2 a.m. Oops! It is freezing cold in New Jersey, and we were so happy in our sandals, i.e. until now. :)

Sunday, April 12, 2009

We Are Back!


We are back to US, New Jersey's spring, Internet connection, working cell phones, and schools.

We brought a lot of memories, pictures, and feelings to go through. When it settles a bit, there will be more reflections here. Until then...

With much love from the Heart,
(Yes, I brought it with ME!)

Tatyana & Michael